My first house...

I bought a house.

What?

I know...big commitment.

I need to put some pictures up, I realize this. The problem is that so far the only time I've had to get over there since closing last week is at night. And let's face it, night starts at 6pm these days so there's no time for sunshine during the week when work is from 8-5. I don't want to take night time pictures. This weekend it will happen though. Photos will happen and so will A LOT OF PAINTING.

I was able to knock out my bedroom and bathroom ceiling, all the trim in those areas, doors to my bedroom and bathroom - in two hours tonight. By myself...with an inflamed sciatic nerve, don't ask about that, it's a sore subject. Or, as a friend said more eloquently, "it's a pain in the ass".

Backing up - closing went well. I mean, I've only been to one, so I guess it went well. Everyone seemed happy. Kim was SO awesome and came with me. I was feeling pretty nervous (not sure why, I was only signing my life away) beforehand and once I knew she would be there for moral support I felt a lot better. The person collecting all the signatures said I "cracked her up" because I was so calm...what was I supposed to do?

This happened during the session-of-signing-my-life-over:

Seller's realtor: "were you three (Kim, me and Sharee, one of the sellers) in the same sorority in school?"

Us: "Yes"

Seller's realtor: "oh that's so wonderful. What sorority?"

Us: "Alpha Delta Pi"

Seller's realtor: "I was an ADPi!"

So awesome.

This weekend is HALLOWEEN! Hopefully I'll find time to dress up and have a bit of fun too! Maybe I'll go as a homeowner, covered in paint...(lame?)

Goals for this week and weekend: TAKE PICTURES. Finish the ceilings in all rooms, trim all over house, and tape down. Perhaps prime in as many areas as possible if all of the above gets done...I'm hoping my friends will come help!

Then, Mr. Thomas (Kim's dad) is coming to help a few days next week - YES! I am forever indebted to that family. I love them as my own. Aw.

Wish me luck!

Grad School...

"May I ask why are you in graduate school?" he asked...this man I recently met.

This question bothered me for a multitude of reasons. The primary reason probably being because it made me second guess my decision to start graduate school now - while working full time, traveling to France each spring, advising the Eta Zeta Chapter, and attempting to maintain a social life of sorts...

Not only that, it made me second guess my decision to "nest" in Hattiesburg for a few years. I decided to buy a house, a house I'm VERY excited about, but nevertheless I started second-guessing myself.

I started second guessing my entire reason for living my life the way I am.

"Aren't they paying for 6 hours at a time, Jess?" asked a fellow graduate student pursuing her Doctoral degree in Communication Studies. "Yes, they are paying for 6 hours at a time." "Well, THAT'S why you're doing it now! Why not take advantage of that while you can? This is a great time to do that - and besides, if you hadn't started this semester we would have never met." [grin] - so true.

I've come to terms with it now, I think it's healthy to meet people who ask simple questions that challenge everything you think you've learned to a certain point. It intrigues me to have met someone who challenges my very being...too bad this person is a man, that always complicates things. [sigh]

The reason I sat down to finally post after being silent for many months? I have an assignment due in three days. I have to choose a topic to research, present the rationale for the study, then create a proposal for the study, research questions, sub-questions and method. And I've been over-stressing about this seemingly minute task (or so says the professor).

And what does this mystery man who challenges me to question my very existence and purpose in life have to do with my research topic?

After some self-reflection, and some reminding myself that I'm not "here" forever, that this too is a temporary nesting place for me, that it is OKAY for me to stay in one place for a while even if the rest of my life experience contradicts that, and that my nesting place for now can be America, Mississippi, Hattiesburg, for the time being, I started to think about people like me. I started to wonder if others have had this same discussion with themselves. Do other TCKs ever fully adjust to life at "home" in America?

So I hopped on the computer to research TCKs and to look at research that already exists. I decided if I found enough support, I might like to propose further research on Third Culture Kids and their identity, successes in life, re-entry into their "home" country (according to their passport)...I haven't come up with a specific topic yet, nor a rationale for studying this group of people, but I did stumble across an article that caught my eye. Specifically this paragraph:

"The answer to the question of how long it takes them to adjust to American life is: they never adjust. They adapt, they find niches, they take risks, they fail and pick themselves up again. They succeed in jobs they have created to fit their particular talents, they locate friends with whom they can share some of their interests, but they resist being encapsulated. Their camouflaged exteriors and understated ways of presenting themselves hide the rich inner lives, remarkable talents, and often strongly held contradictory opinions on the world at large and the world at hand."
For the entire article visit: http://www.iss.edu/pages/kids.html

Again, I was already feeling very satisfied with my answer to the question posed at the beginning of this post, and to the sub-questions that then arose from it. But, this article reinforced a feeling of pride, self-understanding and calmness in me - specifically the paragraph above. It sums up my thoughts and experiences here. It sums up what I feel my entire life will be, a constant adaptation to my surroundings.

Now, if I could only come up with a way to propose a research study related to all of this thinking I'm already doing!

"There's only sex and money"

As I sit sit on the Jubilee line heading back toward Waterloo station from Canary Wharf, suddenly I'm thinking of something to seriously consider: living in a major city for a few years...

You're probably considering the title of this post and thinking, "what the hell is she about to say?" - don't worry, this post has very little to do with sex or money.

I just left a fantastic date and am on to my last night "farewell" gathering on the Southbank.

My date was with a Chilean man I met through a mutual friend, so intriguing and so fun, and I'm sad we met as late as we did because I think we would have a lot of fun together. An old, old friend came to visit my last weekend in London and her friend (the Chilean) joined us at The Globe for "As You Like It". I'll just say that I definitely noticed him that night.

Two days later I received a text, from the Chilean. I hadn't given him my number. My friend did. Apparently there was some chatter on the inter-office online network and my number had been passed along. Anyway, the date was great. He is great. And he'll go so far in life. I only hope to stay in touch - after such a short time knowing each other.

Back to the title of this post...Suddenly, the high coming off that international date, coupled with my reflection in the tube window and the married man reading "there's only sex and money" next to me (maybe that has no relevance, but it moved me nonetheless) had me fantasizing about life in a major city with an underground network.

Just something to consider...

Priscilla Queen of the Desert, The Musical...

We went to see Priscilla. I'm not sure what was more entertaining:

A) The fact that our seats were ABOVE the disco ball which was ceiling level - it didn't end up mattering - the glitter and glam could have been seen from the MOON.

B) We couldn't see the front of the stage...again, this didn't stop us from dancing in the aisles.

C) The three lovely-very-straight gentlemen that propped down in the row below us. The amusing part was watching them realize they'd just bought tickets to a drag show.

D) The beautiful man above: Rupert Everett (My Best Friend's Wedding, A Midsummer Night's Dream). Holly screamed from the stairs when she saw him as we exited the building. I thought something was dreadfully wrong until I saw her excited face gasping for oxygen and then heard the couple next to us whisper (in a dramatic British accent) "OH. MY. GOD." I turned to look and only saw a crowd of people. But then, in the middle all the other beautiful men stood the most beautiful one (aside from the ones on stage in drag). There stood, Rupert Everett! Sigh. We most certainly got his autograph. As I was purchasing the show's soundtrack he walked by. And as he was walking towards us, Holly was frantically searching for a pen and paper. Alas...her made-of-100%-recyclable-materials-holds-all-you-could-ever-want-or-need satchel is not the kindest when you're searching for anything in a hurry. I produced pen and ticket stub. Rupert signed it. Beautiful beautiful. Yes, he has aged but who doesn't? I suppose Demi, Cher, the original Priscilla perhaps...but that's another topic for another day. He looked smashing without even trying. And it was wonderful.

But who does the autograph belong to??

Priscilla Queen of the Desert, The Musical...I loved it even without having seen the movie. I loved it for all of the above. It was more than a theatrical performance, it was simply sensational.

FriendOfMuslim

If you've kept up with my blog, you know by now that I grew up in what some might call: predominantly Islamic countries. Many have always feared for my families safety in these "predominantly Islamic countries". I have never felt safer anywhere else. It should come as no surprise that I am an open individual when it comes to race and religion.

People who don't know me, don't know that about me. So, they don't know that I might not react the same way they do when it comes to certain topics like: global warming, immigration, France, but more importantly for this post: the fear of Islam overtaking the world. To be quite honest, I have many Muslim friends who live their lives just as faithfully if not more faithfully than my "Christian" friends. But, I'm not going to make this an argument about religion, about who is right or wrong, what path you should take - I am not one to force my values or beliefs on anyone and I will not do that here.

I received an email from someone who my office has done business with. I had never personally communicated with the organization until joining our team full time this past January. We set up a week stay for some students from a university in the U.K. to come over and perform Katrina relief work on the Gulf Coast and surrounding areas. Over the course of the exchange I might have sent and received a total of 7 emails regarding our business transaction/schedule...and it was the last email I received, after all was said and done, that bothered me the most.

The subject was "THIS IS WORTH WATCHING!!!!!!!"

The text body said:

Watch this before they take it down...

I've exhausted searches on the internet and found that the info seems to be true, as far as available data is available. Why it isn't the topic of the day is surprising.

Log on and watch this video in privacy as soon as possible, as it will surely be hacked and brought down when it is discovered by extremists as they surely won't want us to know this info. If possible, save to your hard drive so that you may send it yourself in case that happens. I have verified that it is currently virus free, but make sure your virus scanned is on when watching it.

It is VERY disturbing info that all Americans should see - Democrat & Republican. This is a not a slam against our government or our President, it is something we need to understand and rally around ourselves.

[Link deleted]

It is info that you may want to pass on to your Pastor, so that they may pass it on themselves. I understand that some Pastors are playing this in Sunday services across the nation and building a series of Sunday sermons around it. Do with it as you seem fit.

Feel free to reply with whatever feedback with how it makes you feel. Absolutely pass this email on to your list of email addresses.

Thank you for your attention.

Immediately I thought, "I probably shouldn't watch this..." The person who uploaded the video goes by "FriendOfMuslim". I knew it would likely irritate me. So, of course curiosity got the best of me and I clicked on the link.

The video started out with facts (all facts go un-cited, I might add) concerning the reproduction rate of various nations. Several in Europe, the Middle East and then also in Canada and the U.S. Apparently a certain reproduction rate must be reached for a population to sustain its culture. And the frightening point this video attempts to get across is that the Islamic world nations are reproducing twice as fast as the United States. "Our children's world will be unlike anything we experience in our world today".

What's interesting is that suddenly the United States' "culture" includes the Latino population (because they are predominently Catholic) - which I find amusing because the people who made and believe this video likely do NOT consider the Latino population of the U.S. as "their own" [white] culture...well, until the threat of the Islamic world is upon us, as this video portrays.

Is that what some call a double standard? I'm not sure...

From all of the "facts" and quotes in this video, the message I received was: if you are Christian, go out and procreate. We must sustain our population. The Islamic world will take over if we do not continue to reproduce our race/religion.

Now, tell me how that makes sense...? I can't go out and procreate in my current single state - that would be frowned upon, wouldn't it - but if it were in the name of "sustaining our culture"?

What the video fails to address is the question of, "why is Islam the largest growing religion world wide?" Why?

I didn't respond to the email, although I spent a good 30 minutes coming up with various responses, but none of them could explain why this forward was so offensive to me without offending the person who sent it to me. And, my point is not to offend - ANYONE.

Please, remember to think about who you forward things to - especially when you don't know the recipient from Adam...we all know what ass-u-me'ing does to a person. And, if you are going to foward a message, it might be good to check the facts, and ask certain questions...

I am a TCK...

The following was my college entrance essay. It's also been "published". As a senior class we published a book of short stories, I keep telling myself I'm going to look for it on Amazon.com but never remember. Anyhoo - from, "Indescribable...A collection of thoughts from the class of 2002 American Community School of Abu Dhabi":

I am a TCK
Jessica Lamb
American

I am a third-culture kid. Third-culture kids are raised in a culture other than that of their parents and their nationality. Experts describe us as social chameleons. We easily adapt to new surroundings and situations. We make close friends quickly because we understand each other and share common backgrounds.

My parents are both native Mississippians. But I was born in the foothills of the Himalayan mountains on December 14, 1984, in the Landour Community Hospital in Mussoorie, India. I spoke Hindi to my ayah (maid), and ate rice only with my hands. It took me years to get over bobbing my head from side to side, the Indian way of saying yes, no, and maybe. When I visited America for the first time I was a year old. I asked my grandparents for khanah (Hindi for food). Just as they didn't understand me, I didn't understand where my ayah was and why my grandmother did all the house work. "Grandmama, why are you the maid?" But I have come a long way from being a year old. I know how to adapt.

I have lived in four different countries: Kuwait, Pakistan, Indonesia, and the United Arab Emirates (where I will graduate), and I have visited over 25 others. All my friends are third-culture kids. I have grown up with Indians, Pakistanis, Koreans, Taiwanese, Dutch, Scandinavians, and Latinos, to name a few. Many-a-time my nationality has been the minority in my community. I can tell the friends that I make where I have lived, and they understand. We are comfortable with each other because, one way or another, we have been in each other's shoes. I'm not alone when I say I have been able to walk outside and laugh at monkey swinging mischievously in the trees while I sip my chai (tea) and speak with the dudh walla (milkman). I have been able to step off campus and talk to the local children fishing in the open sewer while I wait for their father to hand me my sate ayam (chicken kebabs) enriched with the smell of peanut sauce from his vending cart. I have been able to take a twenty-minute drive in any direction and suddenly be in the middle of a desert surrounded by an eternity of stars. This is my life, and while these events are exotic to some, they are normal to me and my TCK friends.

When I visit my family in the summer, I don't expect everyone to understand. Not everyone has danced with Balinese dancers, scuba-dived in the Java Sea, ridden a camel in the Arabian Desert, or an elephant in the Malaysian rain forest. Not everyone has climbed the pyramids of Egypt or walked the Great Wall of China. But it is so frustrating when people ask me where I am from. Most of the time I reply, "Oh, just the other side'a Biloxi,"even though I have never been to that Mississippi town.

It will be hard for me when I graduate and have to move to "home." Few share my background. The generalization that the third-world culture consists of famine, disease, pollution, and over-population is frequent with the people I encounter. How will I ever explain that it is so much more? How will I describe relaxing under coconut trees, watching a kaleidoscopic sunset as soft, volcanic-black sand tickles between my toes? How can I describe the sounds of Gamelon music intertwining with peaceful, cool ocean waves lapping just feet in front of me?

But I'm not worried. I'm excited about coming home. I miss my grandparents, I miss Wal-Mart. McDonald's is as exotic to me as manaeesh jibneh (breat filled with salty goat cheese) is to most in America. I am ready to learn about America, a country I know little about. Maybe college will really be the lifetime experience everyone says it is. Maybe who I am will add to someone else's experience. But even now, the feeling of homesickness that will overcome me the first month or so stirs in the pit of my stomach and brings tears to my eyes.

Regardless, I will conquer the standard-shift automobile and earn my driver's licence. I will attend a Homecoming dance.

I'm scared, but I'll be fine. My grandmother assures me that because I'm from Rankin County, I have every right to be a redneck if I so desire. I don't know about that, but I do know that from Mussoorie to Mississippi, I am a third-culture kid, and I will adapt.


It's funny, I read it now and so many memories come back to me. I had NO idea how difficult moving to college would be, my first experience with studying abroad, if you will. Life is crazy.

I love my job...

In January I was hired as a coordinator for the Office of International Programs at The University of Southern Mississippi.

What does that mean?

Well, if I were to pull from those descriptive words they recommend you use to vamp up a resume, I: coordinate, manage, publicize, market, recruit, promote, facilitate, counsel, advise, aaaaaand that's all I can come up with off the top of my head. I do all of these things, as a coordinator for study abroad.

So?

So, permanently I reside in Hattiesburg, MS. But for a little over four months this year, I will be abroad managing a study abroad program our office coordinates. From 5 July - 5 August, I will reside at King's College in London (England), helping manage our British Studies Program. Started in 1976 the BSP is actually the largest program of its kind operated by a U.S. university. That's awesome.

And?

Then, in the beginning of February I'll head to the heart of the Loire Valley of France, to reside in a 1,000 year old Benedictine Abbey which rests in the small town of Pontlevoy. As a semester program, I will live here, and manage the program, for three months. Not by myself, of course - no, with the program Director, student coordinator and faculty to help - The Abbey Program changes the lives of students who participate. I know this because it changed my life significantly as a student in 2004. I'm sure one day I'll write about that experience.

Wow. I know.

It's just as exciting in Hattiesburg, really. Serving as a resource to students looking for a program to suit their major/year in school/goals is so rewarding. And the very best part, is hearing their voice on the other end of the phone, just calling to share how amazing their adventures have been. Or seeing their faces when they come back to our office for the first time since departure, anxious to share their stories and photos.

Sometimes, when I think about what classmates from middle and high school are doing, I think "boy is my life boring...I'm not amounting to much". BUT THAT'S CRAZY! I have a passion for study abroad, education abroad, and travel in general....and that's what I coordinate FOR A LIVING!

Sure, sometimes I freak out thinking about "the next step" - but I've NEVER known what my next step would be. Doors just open and I step through them, and I'm kind of hoping that will continue to happen. I'm starting Grad School in the fall for Speech Communication - well, if I can get my application packet in, that is. That will keep me here a while. Then, who knows? I think about buying a house every day, hopefully Dad can help with that decision soon (they get home Monday!).

We'll just have to see. But for now, I love my job and where I am in life. It's pretty awesome.