home for the holidays

Mom and Dad came home today. It never feels like a holiday until they are home. We (Jenny and I) were all at grandmama's with the rest of the grandkids making apple pie, apple date cake, and Christmas decorations out of paper plates, wrapping paper and stickers. Lori called, "guess who's at the airport?" We expected mom and dad at 8:30PM from Jakarta via Singapore, Moscow and Houston. it was around 4 when Lori called.

"Who?"

"Your mom and dad!"

"What? Oh! Well I guess I"ll go get them then!" So Jenny and I scrambled up our stuff and be-bopped over to the airport.

Sometimes I wonder what it would be like if we had grown up in the U.S. Or if mom and dad had moved home when I moved to college, or at least when Jenny moved here. Instead, our parents continue to travel the world and explore new places. Sometimes it makes living in Hattiesburg difficult, I think of how much I'm missing out there...

I wonder if I will ever feel 100% happy/comfortable/content/satisfied with where I am or what I'm doing. Part of me thinks I need to move back overseas full time - I feel like I have the Peace Corps application to fall back on if I ever REALLY get desperate. That's something on my bucketlist. But my current employment sends me abroad - I'm itching to get back to Asia though...perhaps I'll save up for a trip to visit M&D in Jakarta next year.

Then sometimes I think if I met the right guy, and it was the right timing, then it wouldn't matter where I lived, because every day would be an adventure.

That's what it is....this need to be constantly challenged, to feel adventure even if it's within every day routine. Right now I'm challenged at work. Career-wise I'm loving it more everyday. Especially when I don't let silly things like unreturned phone calls and unanswered emails, or beautiful memories, or people riding the elevator ONE flight, or other people's personal issues...when I don't let insignificant things like these bog me down I'm focused and on my game. When I'm on, I'm so on and love life.

It's when I start making compromises - too many, I start to notice my attitude turns sour.

When I can't make a clean break, or get any kind of closure in certain areas of my life, my emotions start to take control and I certainly don't like that feeling.

I have a lot to think about. I need to move on from something whether I get to do it in a clean way (my way) or not....I feel like this post has gone from excitement about M&D coming home to my frustrations within my personal life. Maybe I don't want a personal life anymore, maybe I just need a break from all that. Period. Who knows? We'll see.

For now, Mom and Dad are home, I have two weeks off work, that's all I want or need for the time being.

Have a wonderful day/night/evening and I'll do my best to make my next post less vague and all-over-the-place.