what have i done?
I'll blog about Alaska soon enough, it was amazing - but more importantly after that trip I've ended up on an online dating website.
Yes I realize I can't just "end up" on one of those things, I have to actually put myself up there, unless you're like a friend of mine who has a friend that secretly does it for them and then 'fesses up after the friend really likes one of the matches...end of story is once my friend got over her anger at the other friend for doing that to her, she's in a relationship with a match from online!
I already knew a few couples through the six degrees of separation thing who have met their match on an online dating site, but after Alaska and an email from a dear friend, that number grew by three!
So I decided "why not try it out?" and stayed up last night to see what it was all about, jet lag still has a grip on me - hence the facebook status "why am I still awake at 3AM!!??!?!?"
I'm doing this for a year. It's going to be a fun, entertaining, and who knows maybe I'll find a match?
That's still weird for me to think about.
So after I signed up, I answered what felt like a personality test I took as a student in college on one of the leadership teams I served. I uploaded photos, but which ones? Do I select a variety of funny, serious, goofy, etc? Absolutely I do! Then you get to answer questions...it's not very different from creating or editing your facebook profile, to be honest, but you're just conscious of the fact that it's a "dating" website. Which is kind of strange but maybe that's just something I'll get used to.
After the whole process, immediately I have 6 new matches! Wow. I don't know if that's good or average or I don't care.
You can check out someone's profile, view their photos, and read how they answered those same questions you just spent over an hour completing. If you get that gut feeling of, "ooooh, I know I don't want to go down this path...." you can archive the match. These archived matches can still communicate with you, they can ask for an icebreaker or for you to answer some get-to-know-you questions, and you can decide whether to give them another look. If you're still not interested you just "close" the match and that's that. Much easier than actual face-to-face dating when the guy just can't EVER pick up the hint after you've said a dozen times, "I am not interested in you."
I archived 4 of the matches pretty quickly. One asked today if I would be interested in a chat (online, not on the phone) and so I sent him some get-to-know-you questions. We'll see how it goes...why not?
1 in 5 relationships today met online. Maybe I'll go on a few dates. I'll tell you this, I didn't limit my search to Hattiesburg, MS or the US. I opened it up to the whole WORLD. So far all my matches have been within a 200 mile radius...
I think it will be interesting, and I plan to make the most out of it. And don't worry friends and family, my best-friend-of-an-assistant-DA-who-prosecutes-sex-offenders and her police-officer-husband have already laid down the law, "no going on any dates before a background check is run to see if he's a chester-molester or has any outstanding warrants, only dates in public places and only meeting in the middle (no picking up at your house or near it)!!!"
And before anyone goes and thinks, "aw, poor Jess, she's become so desperate...."
Get over yourself. Puh-LEASE!
I'm just curious to see what it's all about.
In fact one of those friends currently in a relationship from online said to me, "it doesn't seem to me like you have a problem meeting men, you just haven't met the right one..."
True. My mother said something about that with a chuckle in her tone this summer too, I don't have a problem meeting men. At all. In fact one hesitation I had about signing up was that I'm not sure I'm open to meeting a life partner right now, so what if that interferes with the success of this site?
I just had a flash of that movie "How to Lose a guy in 10 days" but I was the main star and the movie was about online dating. I feel like I could write an article for a magazine about this experience! Or maybe I'll just keep blogging about it.